OCR::/Vol_097_098/WLURG39_RTP_19960920/WLURG39_RTP_19960920_001.2.txt ‘R i i» ‘ 'J7"v-‘l‘./',é:‘.l'-iS!T‘v‘ 2414150 SEP 2 3 1995 A Cilia fling-tum ifihi VOLUME : NUMBER 5 Swipe your way to safety: , BY LIZ DETTER PHI STAFF WRITER It’s Wednesday night. A student makes his way to the door of Woods Creek West Apartments. He is tired after a long night of partying. He pulls on the door handle, anticipating the warm comfort of sleep awaiting him. But what is this? The door is locked! He mutters an expletive under his breath and pounds on the door, but to no avail. If only he had his University Card! Oh well, he thinks as he vaults onto a first floor balcony, calmly strides through the empty common room, lets himself into the main hall of the building, and climbs the stairs to his apartment. This scenario actually occurred. The new security system in Woods Creek and Gaines Hall has led to some creative solutions to the predicament of being locked out. WASHINGTON & LEE UNIVERSITY The security system installation began last year with the freshmen dorms. Over the summer, an identical card- swiping system was installed at the main entrances to the upperclass residences. This was the second phase of the implementation of a more comprehensive security system on W&L’s campus. In, the pa_st, the University had been concerned with the security of the dorms. W&L Chief of Security Mike Young said, “I felt, and the Dean of Students felt, we were not providing the security we should for the students. The extension of the University “One-Card” was an easy jump.” The card-swipe system is designed to limit access to University housing to members of the W&L community. It is very simple. Just swipe your University Card, wait’for the green light, the door unlocks, and GENERAL NOTES According to information released by U.S. News & World Report magazine, Washington and Lee Univer- sity is now ranked 13th among the nations top liberal arts colleges and universities. Last year W&L was ranked 15th. This year marks the third con- _ secutive year that Washing- ton and Lee has moved up in Washington and Lee University ranks among the top colleges and universities ' in the nation in support per student according to a recent study by the Council for Aid to Education (CAE) entitled Voluntary Support of Education Survey 1995. Washington and Lee ranked fourth in alumni support and 19th in support by all sources (alimni and corporations) in the category ‘The 20 Colleges or Universities Reporting the Most Voluntary The Washington and Lee School of Law was one of three institutions to receive the American Bar Association’s E . Smythe Gambrell Award for Professionalism. The award, presented at the Bar Association’s annual meeting in Orlando, was established in 199 1 by the A.B.A. Standing Committe on Professionalism to recognize bar associations, W&L MOVES TO 13TH IN U.S. NEWS: UNIVERSITY TOP IN ALUM SUPPORT: LAW SCHOOL EARNS ABA AWARD: Compiled by David Balsley and James Sammons the U.S. News rankings. Among the categories used to evaluate the institutions are academic reputation, student selectivity, faculty recources, freshman retention rate, and alumni giving rate. Washington and Lee was also ranked number 20 by the magazine in the category of best value-discount price. Support Per Student in 1995.” The Voluntary Support of Education Survey, conducted by the Council for Aid to Education, is designed to obtain information on the amounts, sources, donor- specified purposes, and forms of private gifizs, grants, and bequests recieved by educational institutions. The 1995 survey collected data on funds raised from private sources for the fiscal year beginning July 1, 19.94 and ending June 30 1995. law schools, law firms, and ~ other law related organizations that “further the professional and ethical development of lawers, before they even become lawyers.” The W&L law school was recognized for the “ProfessionalismThrough Law and Literature Studies” program offered to upper-level law students and alumni. F OPINION GENERATION Ln: Tips from Betsy on how to pass a summer inMetro Lex . page 2 } FEATURES I4 Suddenly Susan is in Spin City with those Misbehaving Men in C. E. Miller's fall TV A review. G-word. . .something those seniors don’t wanna hear. . .in Reality 101. And, yes, we admit it, Alex Christensen doesn’t know Jack. page 3 V SPORTS Football prepares to open ODAC play against Giiford College tomorrow. Mens and womens soccer remain underieated. Volleyball reigns supreme at home invita- tional. Check outthe Phi's Jock Shorts. The Big Fan busts on the Olympic coverage. page 4 re-locks behind you. The trick is to have a University Card. What about pizza delivery? Young said, “What we anticipated was going to be a problem last year was not. People that wanted pizza just had to meet [the delivery guy] .” Sophomores are accustomed to the system, and got into the habit of carrying their University cards as freshman. It’s no big deal to them, nor will it be to the Class of 2000. With a shrug of her shoulders, sophomore Laura Cohen said, “We’re used to it; we did it last year. We know we can’t live without our cards.” Juniors and seniors are having more difficulty adjusting to the new system. Marisa Frost, a junior, said, “It’s a chafe. I appreciate the concern for our safety, but I don’t see the necessity. I’m sure it will cut down on thefts, but when I forget my card, it’s a pain to bang on the door.” According to Young, thefts were not the primary reason for the extension of the system. “We weren’t thinking about that. We were thinking about extending all of ourhousingunderthesamesystem.” Nonetheless the benefits are evident. Young said, “Two years ago we had 30 instances of theft from [freshman] dorm rooms. Last year we had 2 instances.” Junior Celeste Rasmussen, an R.A. in Gaines expressed feeling safer this year. “Last year there were random people from town who would wander through thehalls,diggingtlu*oughtrashcans. Although all the bugs aren’t worked out, I still it’s a good system.” According to Young, “We’re working to adjust those problems.” Last year, one of the glitches was that library copy LEXINGTON, VIRGINIA cards unlocked the doors. This is no longer the case. The back doors of Woods Creek West and Central are currently being replaced and outfitted with new locks. Additionally, doors that work slowly are being adjusted. As part of the security system, emergency phones were installed outside Woods Creek Central and beneath the Gatehouse in Gaines. This brings the number of security phones up to 4. These phones can be used to call security, or to buzz someone to let you in. The card-swiping system, is the wave of the future at W&L. The openness and accessibility of the campus have been strong selling points of the school. The new system runs in tandem with those ideas. Although no formal plans have been made, the law school, the library, and computer labs SEPTEMBER 20, 1996 Security system added to upperclass housing are possible sites for future security systems. Fraternity houses, which are campus- owned, may not be immune, either. Young stated, “It’s something that’s in my mind and has been discussed.” Lexington seems very safe, and some students came here trying to escape the worries of the real world. However, after reports of theft and the occasional “Peeping Tom,” it appears that Lexington is not quite so idyllic. Young encourages students to lock their doors. Students can reach the security office 24 hours a day at x8999, and should call any time they feel hesitant to walk home, or see anyone suspicious lurking about. And remember—the University One-Card——don’t leave home without it, unless you want to break in to your building. SCC votes to morph into SJC BY RACHEL Gonpu PHI STAFF WRITER t’s not often that someone decides it is time for change here at Washington and Lee, but that day has finally arrived for the Student Con- duct Committee. This decision was prompted by the vision of SCC Chair Robert Covington '97 as well as the University’ s desire to break away from it’s hard drinking, hard partying national reputation. The plans for the future are radical, and not just by W&L standards. The Student Conduct Committee which deals with infrac- tions such as hazing, vandalism, and fight- ing will be renamed the Student Judicial Council (SJ C). In order to make the hearing process more efficient the SJC will follow a plethora of new rules as dictated in the Blue Book. Similar to the Executive Committee’s White Book, the Blue Book outlines penal- ties for most digressions from gentlemenly conduct. Like the White Book, the SJC’s own version of Crime and Punishment will be available for students to read soon and is already beingused to ease the transition from the Student Conduct Committee to SJ C. In the past, the existing committee has not always exercised its authoriy and the administration has intervened. The new sys- tem hopes to change all that and bring back more “students governing students.” The SJC will be staffed by four elected justices, one from each undergraduate class, and the three law school class presidents, an SJ C chair and secretary elected by student body. These nine people will be voting mem- bers of the committee. In addition to the nine voting members, four permanent advis- ers, the Head Dorm Counselor, Head Resi- dence Assistent, the Heads of the Interfra- ternity Council and Panhelenic, will also sit on the committee. “[The permanent advisors‘] input is de- signed to raise the level of SJC decisions and maintain the highest sense of justice in SJC decision,” Paul Saboe, current SCC secre- tary explained. Unlike the current system, undergradu- ate class officers will not be involved in the hearing of conduct cases. The issue of what will happen to class officers has not been resolved yet. The new program seems to benefit both the accused and the council. Students, by reading the Blue Book, will have a better idea of what they can expect and board members will have an easier time deciding their fate. The entire overhaul centers around the fact that specific guidelines for each infraction are already known in advance. This will make the system stronger, easier and more efficient. Discussions have already begun with campus leaders to inform them of what is going on and to take into consideration their ideas. In late October it is expected that the proposal will go to the Student Affairs Com- mittee and if it succeeds there, will travel to the faculty for final approval. If all goes as planned by many hard working W&L‘ers, the SJC will be a reality in fall 1997. Now...don’t you wish you hadn’t thrown that last beer bottle??? 1996 Convocation Initiates new tradition BY DAVID BALSLEY PHI STAFF WRITER 11 Wednesday, Septem ber 11, Washington and Lee University ini- tiated the 1996-1997 academic year by hosting Opening Convo- cation. This year’s convocation, unlike the Convocations of pre- vious years, was open to all stu- dents. Although the Front Lawn had been the intended sight of Opening Convocation, the event was moved to the Warner Cen- ter. Until the mid-1960s, Open- ing Convocation was open to all students. However, for the past three decades, only seniors and representative law students were invited to the event. This year, President John W. Elrod re-established the tradi- tion of inviting all students to Opening Convocation. Elrod based his decidion on his belief that “a university-wide occasion to remind ourselves of our pur- pose as a university” should be open to the whole school. Look- ing to the future, Elrod com- mented that Opening Convoca- tion will be open to the whole university each year. He added that he would like to make con- vocations, which would be open to all students, “regular occurences” at W&L. Elrod, in conference with the V faculty and administration of W&L, selected Paula P. Brownlee to speak at this year’s convoca- tion. Brownlee is the current President of the Association of American Colleges and former President of Hollins College. Brownlee was reccomended to Elrod by Linda Lorima. Approximately seven hun- dred and fifty students, faculty members, and visitors swarmed into the Warner Center to hear Brownlee speak on the value of a liberal arts education. Elrod stated that he was “pleased with the freshman attendance, and with the senior attendance,” and that he was pleased that a num- ber of sophomores and juniors were present at convocation. Elrod summed his impressions of the turnout at Opening Convo- cation by commenting that at- tendance was “quite good.” In addition, Dean of Students David L. Howison praised the Class of 2000, stating, “What was excep- tional was the attendance by the freshmen.” Elrod bemoaned the neces- sity of moving Opening Convoca- tion from the Front Lawn to the Warner Center. “It is always desirable to have university events which involve the whole University on our picturesque campus,” Elrod stated. “The Front Lawn, with Lee Chapel in the background, is a natural am- phitheater.” Elrod continued, “The Warner Center is noisy and hot and a great place to play basketball, but no place for an opening convocation.” Sharing Elrod’s sentiment, Howison stated that “having it inside changed the character of the Con- vocation.” Opening Convocation was followed by a dinner sponsored by the President’s Office and ca- tered by Washington and Lee University Dining Services. Elrod praised the hard work of Brian Shaw and Holt Mer- chant, to whom he gave credit for planning all the details of Open- ing Convocation. Elrod also ex- pressed his great appreciation for all the work that Buildings and Grounds and Dining Ser- vices did in preparing for the event. The speed and efficiency of these groups, Elrod stated, was highly commendable. tateif , However,_‘ the‘ modern -Nietzsche. Mansfi_eld~ com those whosupportied the . , zmented that the German phi Americanmovementgrewou I "of the philosophy of such Ger-‘ 1 ' ‘g V , ‘man greats as ‘ Friedrich”-3' OCR::/Vol_097_098/WLURG39_RTP_19960920/WLURG39_RTP_19960920_002.2.txt PAGE 2 OPINION The Ring-Tum Phi, SEPTEMBER 20, 1996 Things to do in Lexington when it's dead GreenLand Betsy Green ’97 I stayed in Lexington all sum- mer. About half an hour after graduation last June, just about all of the students cleared out. A dog could have taken a nap in the middle of main street and would have been undisturbed until the law students came back. In spite of the fact that Lexing- ton is rather, er, quiet in the sum- mer, there were a lot of ways to keep myself amused here. For one thing, I worked a lot. I gave tours for the admissions of- fice. So ,in essence, I spent most of my summer walking backwards “The most fun you can have . . . in Virginia.” while high school students fol- lowed me around asking questions. And what questions they were. There are some really weird people out there. Like the guy who wanted to know how many acres of land W&L has. Yeah, an important factor in any college decision. I assured him there’s plenty of room for everyone. One dad asked me several technical questions about the computers in our labs, perhaps thinking his son would use them for something other than writing papers or e-mail. After telling him for the fifth time, “I don’t know, but I’d be happy to direct you to ‘ University Computing,” I gave up and told him that most of the com- puters were either grey or beige and that was all I knew. A lot of sticky questions came from overprotective parents. I think I have finally come up with a good way to answer The Alcohol Ques- tion that is honest, yet doesn’t make us look like drunken heathens. A lot of parents asked me about smok- ing, panic-stricken that any smoke might enter Junior’s lungs. Some of them were supposedly severely allergic to smoke. If that’s the case, they are going to be screwed wherever they go for the rest of their lives. Some parents went so far as to worry about how the kid would get to the airport without a univer- sity-certified shuttle service. Rather than sending their kids to W&L, where they can learn to take care of themselves, these par- ents should keep their kids locked up like veal, safe from the outside world. I had to laugh at people who asked me detailed questions about our placement in graduate schools for Korean Footwear studies or something. Supposedly, these kids already know what they are going to do with the rest of their lives. Hello? They’re only seventeen! I’m not sure I want to do, but at least I know that. One thing’s for sure; work was never boring (ask me sometime about the tour I gave to a priest). And I can walk backwards like a champ. When I wasn’t walking back- wards, there were still ways to have fun here. My favorite thing to do was go to the different fairs around here. My fiancée Steve and I lost at bingo at the Buchanan fair, and watched girls with big hair fight with their boyfriends. The Lexington fair was also a lot of fun. Many of the stuffed ani- mals to be won were red bulldogs, just like Red Dog beer. Why isn’t someone in Congress protesting this marketing idea? But the most spectacular sights to see were at the Salem fair. People came in from the mountains and made the Salem fair their vacation. And at the Salem fair, Steve and I saw one of the oddest things ever. We went into a free informa- tion booth which featured fun facts about ostriches. How fast they run, how-big their eggs are, things, like that. At theend, we saw live ostriches, running around in their pen. We were then given a coupon for the stand next door, which sold ostrich meat. Whose idea was that? Were people supposed to learn about ostriches and think, “y’know, that sounds tasty?” Could we have chosen our own ostrich, like a lobster? There were commercials for weeks for the Salem fair. The jingle promised that it was, “the most fun you can have. . . in Virginia.” I should have never doubted it. I’d recommend a summer in Lex Vegas to anyone. Nothing beats walking backwards eating an ostrich burger. Quote of the Week: “Is there a single computer in the dorms that works?” -A frustruated Sophomore dent. and obscenity. @112 fling-mm iflhi Executive Editor ................................................................ ..Anne Alvord News Editor .................................................................. ..Hillary Coombs Editorial Page Editor ........................................................ ..Jason Zacher Sports Editors ............................... ..Scott Bookwalter. Bethany Bauman Features Editor .......................................... ..C. E. Miller. Dan Odenwald Photography Editor ........................ .......... ..' ....................... ..Sam Levine Editorial Cartoonists .................................. ..Phil Flickinger, Tom Fallace Business Manager .......................... .. Assistant Business Manager ........... .. Advertisement Composition Artist.... ................................. ..Wi1l Hershey ............................. ..Doug Ghertner .................................. ..Tarah Grant The Ring-tum Phi is published Fridays during the undergraduate school year at Washington and Lee University, Lexington. Virginia. Funding for The Ring-tum Phi comes primarily from advertising and subscription revenues. The Washington and Lee Publications Board elects the executive editor and business manager, but The Ring-tum Phi is otherwise indepen- The Ring-tum Phi welcomes all responsible submissions and letters. All submissions must be in the Phi oflice. room 208 of the University Center, by noon on Tuesday to appear in that week's edition. Letters. columns. and “My Views” do not reflect the opinions of The Ring-tum Phi Editorial Board. Advertising does not reflect the opinions of The Ring-tum Phi or its staff. This newspaper observes current court definitions of libel The Ring]-tum Phi Post Office Box 899 Lexington. Virginia 24450 Telephone: (540) 462-4059 Fax: (540) 462-4060 E-mai: ‘phi@wlu.edu um, GENE‘RATioN LEX BE in me RING mm on: GENERATION Lax ISN'T GDNNA ANYMORE. HMBE we NWT CARTOMIST um. MN»! M6 Somé EVES. Minimum wage, minumum pay Joshua Heslinga ‘98 Just this year, I became a work- study here at Washington and Lee. This past spring, the opportunity presented itself, and I figured that I could certainly use a little extra money to cover expenses that were substantially higher than they would have been at home. So you can imagine my excite- ment, and I’m sure many of you felt the same way, upon hearing that the increase in the minimum wage had passed. The extra money was practically in my bank account al- ready. Now, I should say that I’m a conservative Republican. Had I been in Congress, I would have voted against raising the minimum wage, but upon initial examina- tion, I figured that as long as it had already been raised, why continue to cry over spilled milk when I’m one of those people who will real- ize the increase? You may remember at the time of debate, Democrats in Congress trumpeted the measure, saying that it would finally give struggling Americans a“living wage.” (Never mind that in the two years in which they controlled Congress and the White House, they never saw the need to “help” Americans in this way.) They also demonized Re- publicans who favored a small- business exemption, designed to reduce the number of jobs lost and businesses closed because of the increase. Bill Clinton used the occasion to chide Bob Dole for not wanting to give American workers more money, despite the fact that in the February 6, 1995 issue of Time magazine, Clinton argued that an increase in the minimum wage, “is the wrong way to raise the income of low-wage earners.” While many Republicans agreed that this made good policy (or maybe political?) sense, another group, led by House Majority Leader Dick Armey (R-TX), ar- gued that the minimum wage hurts precisely the same low-skilled, impoverished Americans that pro- ponents said it would help by de- stroying job opportunities that would otherwise be available. Armey and others argued that the increased costs to business of the increased minimum wage would only be passed on to workers in less benefits or less job openings. Theeconomicconsensusonthis point is pretty clear. Yet while few economists would deny that rais- ing the minimum wage costsjobs, some will argue that the societal benefits of increased wages would outweigh the costs of lost jobs. Many of you may remember hearing in Econ 101 that if the mandated minimum wage is higher than the benefits a business would reap from hiring another worker, that business will refrain from hir- Are you a liberal Democrat? Do you find Hes1inga’s conservative opinions enraging? Would you love to take him on in all subjects? Would you like a Weekly political column in the Phi? Then The Ring-tum Phi editorial page needs you. Just get in touch with the Editorial Editor, Jason Zacher, at 463-2556, or write e-mail to: jzacher@wlu.edu ing. Absent that government man- date, that business might be will- ing to hire someone at a lower wage. This is particularly true of small business. As I soon found out, W&L does not rank as a stupid organization. In September, every university work-study student, including me, got a letter telling them that the university would now require that upperclass students work no more than eight hours a week, rather than the previous ten. “. . . you, the person the in- crease was supposed to help, lost money.” Doing the math on this change tells you that this reduces your potential weekly earnings from a gross of $42.50 (10 x $4.25) to $37.60 (8 x $4.70). By my count, this amounts to a loss of $68.60 per student over the 14 eligible work weeks of fall term alone. Multiply that by the 360 work study stu- dents W&L employs, and the total amount of money students will lose during fall term alone reaches an astounding $24,696. Even when the next phase of the minimum wage increase takes ef- fect, each student will still be los- ing $1.30 per week. We’re not talking about insig- nificant amounts of money here, especially to students who need the financial aid a work-study job provides. W&L actually made money on the increase in the mini- mum wage, while you, the person the increase was supposed to help, lost money. This type of business action to avoid the increased costs of the raised minimum wage occurred across the country. As Armey and other warned, businesses won’t stand still as government imposes new mandates upon them; they t I.- will quickly find a way to avoid thug: new costs. (Although you can credit W&L with going the extra mile to find a way to make money in the process.) Government ac- tion does cause change in the economy. Now I do not want to sound bitter, because I’m not. We are lucky — most people working in marginal minimum wage jobs for businesses that can not afford the increased costs just get fired or lose the opportunity to be hired. And it is usually not extra money for them. But the next time you hear a liberal Democrat telling you hoe government can intervene in the economy, whether in the realm of health care, the minimum wage, or some other measure, and not cause any problems, think about the ex- tra course in economics W&L work-study students are receiving this fall. Letters to The Ring-tum Phi Dear Editor, I would like to take this oppor- tunity to thank publicly the entire W&L community for providing such an enthusiastic welcome to the Class of 2000 during the Fresh- man Orientation program. Of par- ticular importance was the work of the Freshman Orientation Com- mittee, and its extraordinary presi- dent, Amy Gorham; the unflaggingly dedicated committee chairmen: Hollis Leddy, Hillary Olson, Atticus Gill, Neal Kohl, and Anurag Chandra; Ms. Michelle Richardson; the Dormitory Coun- selors; the Small Group Leaders; the Big Brothers and Big Sisters; and Mrs. Bonnie Walker, whose behind-the-scenes work made much of orientation possible. All of these people gave unflaggingly of themselves, planning and orga- nizing orientation activities and staffing virtually every orientation event--from Casino Night to air- port shuttles. Thanks also go to: our Build- ings and Grounds staff; our Food Services staff who furnished the culinary touches for several meet- ings and special occasions; Jim Farrar, Rob Mish, Frances Smith,. Kathekon, Southern Comfort, JubiLee, General Admission, and‘. Gordon Spice for the Alimni As-» sociation BBQ; Ms. Jan Neel with‘ Project Safe and Sound; Habitat. for Humanity and APO Service’ Fraternity for excellent leadership of the community service activity; Sandy Hooper, Professor Cecil, and‘ it the Executive Committee for sucit, a meaningful orientation to the' I Honor System. Others too numerous to men- tion also contributed to the Fresh- man Orientation program, and this general note must suffice as a thank you. I am pleased that the Class of. -- 2000--our Millennial Class--was- the beneficiart of such a commu- nity effort! , Dennis G. Manning Dean of the Freshman Program OCR::/Vol_097_098/WLURG39_RTP_19960920/WLURG39_RTP_19960920_003.2.txt f you, Mother Nature.) ~ you, but nobody I know is " many “senior meetings.” . arrival was a triumvirate of smiling ladies from the W3: life PAGE 3 The Ring-tum Phi, saw. 20, 1996 i The etare are back (or those people who never should have tried film) C.E. MILLER Features Editor Baby, they’re back. Those stars who made television worth watching in my earlier less busy teenage years are back trying to convince me that I have other nights besides Thursday to watch television. CBS hopes that Ted Danson (sans toupee) former co-star Rhea Pearlmen (more gentle) and Bill Cosby (sorry no sweaters) can help nudge NBC’s sweep of Neilson’s top ten. ABC is relying on television veteran Michael J. Fox, and “Designing Woman” Annie Potts to stiffen the competition. The other three underdogs (UPN, WB, and FOX) rely on the usual additions to spice up otherwise predictable programming schedules. UPN’s “Homeboys in Outer Space” proves how low some executives will go to get an audience. I mean what is that about? i NBC is still the master of sitcoms. Two additions stand out as exceptional. First “Men Behaving Badly” is a must see (even for this die hard Thursday nighter.) The first episode which previewed onWednesday was exceptionally funny. The writing in strong, and the jokes down to earth. Justine Bateman (Family Ties) is a little bigger, and less into mall shopping and relatively unimportant in this show. Ron Eldard, who spent last season on the critically acclaimed “ER” and Rob Schnieder perfectly portray what happened when Beavis and Butt-Head grew up. The best line of the night had to be, “Some discussions need beer.:” NBC’s other sure fire hit, only because of its time slot, is “Suddenly Susan.” If you like stupid people doing stupid things that would never actually happen then maybe you’ll love it. Personally I feel it resembles the other poor, poor NBC sitcom “Third Rock From The Sun.” The humor in both seems forced and trivial. However Brooke Shields squeezed in the after “Seinfeld” slot should make big Neilson numbers. It isn’t as if I really have time to waste adding new sitcoms to my list of things to do instead of Russian homework, but this season does offer some great reason to put off that memorization a few more hours. The best advice, be thankful we don’t get WB or UPN as part of our cable package and just tune in for the reassuring laughter of Thursday night television, besides new ER the 26th of this month what more can a girl ask for ?. 4 s an. un;-,-.. DAN ODENWALD M y View The g-word is off limits. At least that’s the official agreement of Senior Hollis Leddy and her other friends in the Class of 1997. Graduation — life’s passage out of the secure I and comfortable dorm room into the proverbial “real world.” It’s coming all too fast. (My dad has already made hotel reservations for my entourage). And like most seniors, it scares the hell out of me. Whether you’ve grown four inches, put on 20 Natty Lite pounds, or grown that ever-so-chic goat- ‘tee, Washington and Lee seniors are certainly not those wide-eyed freshmen of September 1993. It’s time to start planning for the future. So, step by step, we’re making our way out of th Palms and into reality. And we’re lookin ” A direction. Take Opening Conv_ in the gym. About 20_ blazers and sundresses start of the academic ye the event was held in t skyrocketed to what felt Through the fluttering of programs 0 hand-held fans, seniors listened to the W9 liberal arts education. Tha reference on their resume. In about as functional as wallpape ure, it makes everything seem pretty, but it won’t pay the electric bill. Okay, so I wanted practical advice — something I cojald actually use. So, I trotted down to the Northen Auditorium on Tuesday and attended the first of Greeting us upon our Career Development and Placement Office. In the span of 45 minutes, Director Beverly Lorig gave us more useful information than I have accumulated in the entirety of my first three years of college — "including Sexpert Suzy Landolphi’s condom demonstrations. We learned everything we needed to know about SLAC, GREs, recommendation forms, interviewing, resumes... yadda, yadda, yadda. It’s enough to make ‘ you crawl under a rock and wait out the storm. Perhaps Senior Class President Sasha Hartman was right on the ball when she exclaimed, “I need a senioreyes on eality 101 Rob Scnieder in "Men Behaving Badly" and Michael J. Fox in "Spin City" shine against the other new contenders. .1». = .-,a .-_, ._ ..-.:rny..«.g,< anal‘: -.-~ ) Valium.” No kidding. How about a dozen... (Oh, by the way, Sasha, can we pay for those out of the penalty tax on our senior dues?) Despondent and disillusioned, I’ve been wandering around the Hill this past week in a daze. Lost and angst-ridden, I was searching for answers. And then I found my kindred spirit. Picture a glcgious and sunny day. The rocking tunes of the Grateful Dead pour out of the speakers in front of the Co-op. The annual poster sale has drawn an unusual crowd of stragglers, late to their one o’clocks. The poster guys look like they just stepped off the set of “Trainspotting.” Everything’s the way it should be. Yet something is out of place. Yes, there she is. Perched behind a giant poster of a scantily-clad U ma Thurman is the voter registration lady. Her chalk-white ha’ t sits firmly upon her head, : ber breeze. Her plain f any 70-something h the wild colors of She has this 10 The chick is shell-sh for this when she V Club meeting. Ye of students pass b cost of Beavis Heckerling, whef next Alicia Silv terminally, Honey, W ‘ future with posters. We are as speechless, confused, and downright frightened. Nevertheless, we follow your example. We do not turn away from what approaches. We do not run from the bleach-blonde dude with the nose ring and neck tattoo. Indeed, we fully realize that the future is here. Tomorrow has turned into today. It’s time to hang up the bong and get in line. Take charge of our destiny. Carpe diem... Wait a minute! Stop! What the hell am I thinking? I only have nine more months of childhood left. I don’t want to leave school. I don’t want to grow up. I don’t want to have to go to bed early on Wednesday nights. The future can wait. For now, I think I’ll throw on my flip—flops, hang out at the Co-op, and figure out a way to eat my frozen yogurt without being attacked by those swarms of killer bees. Hey, it worked for Thoreau! mplete bewilderment. et she never bargained d at the Ladies Rotary ‘ there silently as scores ble to inquire about the tthead posters. Amy u? If you’re looking for the ve got her. She is adorably, clueless. low you feel. We look at the e awe as you do the Magic Eye 2:: -.-1.;-..-,.«-.-.y.~ If you hauen’t seen this film You doni knoui ALEXCHRISTENSEN Phi Movns CRITIC At the beginning of the summer, I listed Jack in my review of Mission: Impossible, as one of the summer films I was really looking forward to. What a disappointment, then, when I saw the finished product. The beginning is cool, with neat-o effects and plenty of interesting business going on, but as soon as Robin Williams comes into the. film as Jack instead of the cute little baby, it all falls down. It seems irresistible, of course. Stick Williams in the role of the little kid who lives in a man’s body and just stand back. And it is a wonderful idea. In fact, it’s so wonderful that they've already done it six times. First, they called it Mark and Mindy, and then they called it Hook, and then they called it The Fisher King, and then they called it Toys, then they called it Mrs. Doubtfire, and then they called it J umanji. And they were all pretty good. So Jack is money in the bank, right? Right! As far as box office re- ceipts. But instead of saying anything new or significant, or perhaps being just light and entertaining and touch- ing, director Francis Ford Coppola, who admits he only directed the film for the CAISI-1!, decided to make it a ___bi,g,,f_‘art j oke. Literally and metaphori- . I.g;ally,...... . . The film is full of little Robin Williams Moments , and some are vaguely amusing, interrupted by short bursts of earnest, concerned, idealistic pap, which serves to try to dupe the audience into believing something is happening. Unfortunately, taken as a whole, there’s just no “there” there. The story: poor old Jack ages at four times the normal rate. This is not a real disease, which is made obvious by the fact that the effects it has on Jack’s life have not even a nodding acquaintance with the circumstances of real life. Jack is a bright, inquisitive kid, and his tutor, played by Bill Cosby, who can’t even get in a good movie even if he waits for one directed by Francis Coppola, recommends to his parents, Diane Lane andBrian Kerwin, that he be introduced to regular school with other kids. Apparently in addi- tion to keeping him out of school, his parents have also kept him locked in the attic or confined on a leash in the backyard, because the neighborhood kids all think he’s some kind of mon- ster, even though he’s lived on their street for ten years. School is tough at first but ulti- mately rewarding for J ack. The kids, getting no explanation for why he’s six feet tall and really old-looking, natu- rally think, “He must have the coo- ties.” They tease him or avoid him, until one smart kid, Louie Durante, played by Adam Zolotin with much skill, figures out that he might be an asset on the basketball court, and be- friends him. Everyone else falls imme- diately into line, cherishingJack’sjoie Jack * 1/2 of 4 stars; can a movie about farting be expected to bring a tear? The pitch: “It’1l be like The Elephant Man meets Big!” de vivre and ability to buy porn. They go to a treehouse and fart in cans. Oh sweet Lord, the hilarity. Jack collapses with a heart problem brought on by his disorder, and his mother panics and takes him out of school (?). But then when Jack gets all depressed and grows a beard and all the kids ride by on their skate- boards and yell “Can Jack come out and play?” over and over again, his mom decides that to avoid all that unpleasantness, she’ll let him go back to school. You might be thinking, this is a plot? Well, no, not in the technical sense of the word, but everyone in the film seems to think it is, so maybe they’re right. There are several weird threads which interrupt this action, ultimately leading nowhere. Louie’s mom, played . .by..Fran. Drescher, hits on Jack when he pretends to be the principal, and this leads Jack to a bar later where he gets in a fight and gets arrested. Also, Jack gets a crush on his teacher (Jen- nifer Lopez, absolutely magnificent) and asks her to the school dance, prob- ably the only sorta honest scene in the film. Some of these subplots are surely viable, but Jack can’t decide which direction it wants to take. It wants to depict the life of a kid growing up with a disease that makes him an outsider, in a humorous, warm-hearted way, but it just doesn’t know how. Williams’s performance is a muddled mishmash of everything he’s ever been in, but with farting. You want to laugh when he’s onscreen, and the physical sensation which results from not being able to is actually pain- ful. As an interesting sidenote, you may be interested to know that during the opening and closing credits, Cana- dian “rocker” Bryan Adams can be distinctly heard singing the improb- able lines, ‘‘There’ll be times/You’ll be dancing and s—t.” Four—letter words long ago invaded PG films, but per- haps we can draw the line at cheap bubble-gum pop. To recap, this film was directed by Francis Ford Coppola, the same Francis Ford Coppola who directed the Godfather films, Apocalypse Now, The Outsiders, Peggy Sue Got Mar- ried, Tucker: The Man and His Dream, Bram Stoker’s Dracula, and other great or passable films. If I didn’t tell you now, you might not be able to figure it out from the film. Basement Band Parties :muc to rival WREL Uncle Mingo Friday @ Sigma Nu Doxy's Kitchen Friday @ Chi Psi Nathan Sheppard Band Friday @ Kappa Sigma Saturday @ Kappa Alpha SweetBox & The Lucious Root Saturday @ Sigma Alpha Epsilon The Breakfast Club Saturday @ Sigma Phi Epsilon I OCR::/Vol_097_098/WLURG39_RTP_19960920/WLURG39_RTP_19960920_004.2.txt . . . _ 5 o “ Generals in action this week. B ‘R Last weews results: FoorrnAu.- Sat. at Guilford. 1:30 Msoecn - Sat. vs. Lynchburg. 2:00: Wed. at Emory & Henry Foovruu. - L. 27-0. vs. Ursinus 7 Wsoocn - Sat. vs. Maryville. 4:30: Sun. vs. Greensboro. 1:00 Msoccn - W. 2- l. vs. Shenandoah: W. 2-1. vs. Catholic V Vou.sinuu.i. - Fri-Sat at Maryville lnvttauonal W8oocE: - W. 3-2 (OT). at Va. Wesleyan: W. 6-0. vs. Hollins ‘ WATER Pow - Sat. at Navy Invitational, 1 1:45 am Vou.nnAu. - Won W&L lnvltauonal; W. 3-0. vs RMWC CROSlCOUN1'lY- Sat. at Dickinson Open WA1-uPoi.o- L. 21-6. vs. Navy: L. 17-6. vs. Vtllanova Gou - Fri-Sat in W&L Fall Golf Classic Cnoss Cour-ru - Men 10th. women 9th at Lebanon Valley Invitational W'I‘:mas - Today \'s. Meredith. 3:30 PAGE 4 FOOTBALL, SOCCER, WATER PoLo, VOLLEYBALL, CROSS COUNTRY SEPTEMBER 20, 1996 4 Volleyball holds serve BY Scorr BOOKWALTER Pm SPORTS EDITOR There has been no letdown for the Washington and Lee vol- leyball team. 1 as W&L shrugged off the pres- sure of being defending ODAC champions last weekend, cut- ting up the competition to win the sixth annual W&L Invita- tional. Martin was back in top form, racking up twelve kills to tie freshman Nancy Reinhart for team top honors. It was the nightcap Friday that almost proved to be the Generals’ undoing as they col- for second W&L Invitational same way it started Friday by sweeping a match in three games. This time Sewanee was the vic- tim,falling15-10, 16-14 and 15- 3 ’ The Generals started the final match against Catholic in style, Also contributing mightily to the Generals’ cause were Reinhart with her 23 kills and 23 di gs, junior setter Ali Beard with 86 assists and sophomore out- side hitter Megan Snodgrasswith 17 kills and 33 digs. C 0 m _ The Generals registered vic- _ _ ing Off 3 tories of 3-0 over Bethany and lided with a tough Johns cruising 15-7 and 15-11. Nowannedwitha4-Orecord, , e C 0 ,- d _ 3-2 over Johns Hopkins on Fri- Hopkins squad. Catholic then rallied for a 15- the Generals hit the road smashing day night before breezing to the After W&L took the first 13 win, but itonly postponed the Wednesday night to open their 29 victo- title Saturday afternoon on the game 15-12, inevitable as the conferenceseasonin Lynchburg ties last coattails ofa 3-0 shellacking of Hopkins came Generals fin- at Randolph-Macon Woman s S e a S 0 h Sewanee and a 3-1 thumping of roaring back. ished off the College. _ and their Catholic. They posted match and the RMWC wished W&L had first ever With the four wins, the Gen- wins of 15-13 tournamentwith stayed home as the Generals O D A C erals have now defended their and 15-11 to a 15-6 victory. breezed in three straight, 15-11, titte it home turf successfully in the move within C0-Captain ~ 15~7,15_'7- W 0 ,1, 1 d last 14 matches. one game of Virginia Yoerg Martin led the way for the Seem diff], W&L kicked off the tourna- breaking the was the star Sat- Generals on Wednesday,amass- cult for the Generals to set their ment with a relatively easy three- Generals’ urday for the ing 11 kills, while Reinhart - - - _ e of Bethan , win- homecourtmas- Generals, head- added 7 kills. Beard racked up figllllltasrlhl ttthes fifiaiohésgagf §;f1:;eb::vtvli:e Scores of 15-y10, 15- tery. ingthe team with 16 assists, and Yoerg pitched in Cfiewlyraurassi g 8 and 15-6. But the Gen- 11 and 12 as- with three solo blocks and two But it has heeh so far so good Junior co-captain Hilary erals weren’t S.1StSa _FeSPeC' 35515tS- . . about to get Hilary Martin _ tively,inthetwo The Generals will take their chased out of matches. 5-0 mark into the Maryville In- their own tour- nament. They stood their ground for a 15-13 squeaker to force a deciding fifth game. With momentum now on their side, the Generals finally put away Johns Hopkins, 15-6, to prevail in the match. Reinhart continued her big Friday night, leading the team with 11 kills against Hopkins. W&L started Saturday the The senior middle blocker was named to the all-tournament team after com- piling an impressive 40 kills and 22 blocks during the tournament. Junior outside hitter Holly Thomsen joined Yoerg on the all-tourney team with her 26 blocks and 35 digs. Martin, as usual, proved to be a force, collecting 31 kills and 35 digs in the four games. vitational this weekend but face a daunting challenge there in the form of Savannah, which is ranked fifth in the South Re- gion. The Savannah match Satur- day will be W&L’s fourth of five matches in the tournament. The Generals are also scheduled to play Emory & Henry and Maryville today and Rhodes and Photo courtesy of W&L Sports Information Eastern Mennonite tomorrow. Virginia Yoerg (right) keyed W&L last weekend. W&L soccer squads kick competition By Soon‘ BOOKWALTER Men’s Soccer Women’s Soccer PHI SPORTS EDITOR The women’s soccer team has enjoyed similar success, taking its first two contests in extremely differ- ent fashions. The Generals opened their season with a nailbiting 3-2 victory over Virginia Wesleyan last Saturday be- fore returning home to maul Hollins, 6-0, on Wednesday. W&L figured to be in for a tough battle Saturday in Norfolk and Vir- ginia Wesleyan didn’t disappoint. Wesleyan led 2-1 with only about three minutes remaining in regulans ’ tion, but sophomore Erica Reineke came to the rescue for W&L as she netted a goal to force overtime. The first overtime came and went with the teams still deadlocked at two goals apiece. The score remained the same throughout most of the second overtime until Mich- elle Bauman took matters into her own hands. With only thirty seconds remaining in the second over- time, the senior tri-captain kicked home the dramatic game-winner, sending the Generals home weary, but 3-2 victors nevertheless. , Sophomore Nicole Johnson scored the other W&L goal ‘ in the Virginia Wesleyan contest and also assisted on another score. I Senior Beth Mozena and freshman Stephanie McKnight teamed up to frustrate Virginia Wesleyan, warding off 16 of 18 shots during the contest. The Generals weren’t in the mood for another tight contest Wednesday as they stormed out onto the Liberty h Hall Fields and obliterated Hollins, 6-0. ‘ l Sophomore Karin Treese had an incredible day for the Generals. She tied a school record with nine points as she ' scored four times and assisted on another goal, giving the ‘ The men jumped out to a 2-0 start thanks to a pair of 2-1 wins last week on the Liberty Hall Fields. The Generals edged Shenandoah, 2-1, on Thursday the 12th, in a fight-marred contest. W&L then knocked off Catholic by an identical count last Saturday afternoon. Freshman Jamie Parker basked in the limelight for the Generals against Shenandoah as he scored both W&L goals. Parker snapped a 1-1 tie with under four min- utes remaining as he kicked home the eventual game-winning goal. Soon after, the emotion from more than 88 minutes of hard-fought play came to a boil as a fight erupted follow- . ing a W&L foul. Tempers flared between the teams, leading to an ugly melee in which a W&L fan joined the brawl. Officials were finally able to intervene and the game finished up with the Generals prevailing by the 2-1 count. Things were less tense but still just as exciting two days later when W&L locked up with Catholic on the Liberty Hall Fields. Sophomore Sam Chase took his turn as the one-man show as he tallied both Generals goals. Both scores came in the second halfas W&L held offCatho- lie for its second straight 2-1 win. Chase leads the Generals with 5 points after the two games, complimenting his two goals with one assist. The W&L soccer squads have tasted nothing but victory thus far this year. After four combined games this year, the men’s and women’s teams have triumphed in each one, many in very dramatic fashion. The Generals have also been rock- solid in the net. Senior Anthony Generals plenty of ammunition against the overmatched Mazzarelli and sophomore Garry Hill Hollins squad. A have combined for seven saves in nine chances. The men will remain at home for the third straight game when they host Lynchburg tomorrow. The game will also feature a 50th season celebration for W&L men’s soccer. Reineke and Bauman notched the other two goals in the . Generals’ conquest, which raised both W&L’s overall and league mark to 2-0. The women, now ranked ninth in the South Region, will be preparing for a busy weekend. The Generals host 3 Maryville tomorrow following the men’s game and then face off against Greensboro Sunday afternoon. A Photo courtesy of W&L Sports lnforrnation Michelle Bauman scored the game-winner Saturday. Ursinus trounces Generals, 27-0 8 Bowl. On the ‘sani éri;‘i BY BETHANY BAUMAN Pm Sroms EDITOR The Generals football team dropped their home opener to the third quarter. W&L’soffensive unit stalled last Saturday, posting only 127 yards of total offense, including 32 yards rushing on 22 carries. Cornerback junior John Benazzi was the Generals’ pri- mary offensive weapon. He \ opened the game well, returning the opening kickoff for 46 yards to the Ursinus 44 yard line. He returned three other kickoffs for 42 yards while also contributing six tackles and breaking up one the third quarter.” Coach Miriello believes that the defense failed to generate the “big plays” the team needed to post a win. There were however some impressive performances on the defensive side. Senior line- backer McGuire Boyd had a team-high 14 tackles, a pass breakup and one tackle for loss. Senior tackle Peyton Williams had 12 tackles, two tackles for loss and a fumble recovery. first start, making 12 tackles, with four solo stops and a touch- down—saving tackle in the third quarter. The Generals will get another chance to break into the “W” column when they open ODAC play at Guilford College in ' Greensboro, North Carolina to- morrow. Miriello believes this first road game will be critical. But the Generals will have to face several challenges, not the least 3 from contention, d_6Spit6.th¢ Ursinus College last week, 27_ Pass_ T h e of which will be the absence of 0. On the te a m ’ s tailback Seth McKinley and “Disappointed, but deter- other side sla fe t ide s Floyd Young, who are both out mined to move forward,” is how of the ball, a so id due to i"J‘”Y- head coach Frank Miriello de- the de- Maintaining well Satur- The defense willhavetocon— scribed the team’s mindset fol- fense also an intensity fOl' g a y . tend withbthe qliiilcknefssl of the lowin turnedina trong Quakers, utwi oeul aso the loss, g less than four quarters safety jun- be able to take advafitage olfthe T h 6 solid pct-- be a ngces- ior Lee young Guilford offensive line. Generals formance_ Miller had As for the W&L offense, the 0 h 1 y The Gen- SitY- the only Generals need to move the ball trailed by e r a | s ,Ch’-is Watson sack of the more than they did against 7 at the playedgwo game for Ursinus. half,’ but and a hatf the Gener- Despite strugglinglastweek, the Bears quarters of als. Healso the inexperienced offensiveline connected solid, agressive defense. contributed seven tackles, in- has been improving in practice for three But, according to free safety cluding a team-high five solo this week and will hopefully be t o u c h — senior Chris Watson, “...the de- stops. able to keep quarterback Brooks downs in fense didn’t get the job done in Watson made the most of his Fischer out of trouble. Watson said that, “Maintain- ing an intensity for four quarters will be a necessity. “We need to pressure the ball on defense and sustain some scoring drives. lf we all play like we can, we will win the game.” 1 . .W&Lplacedniritliove ” all fway-in 23rd. place’ Both squads will run. this week- end at Dickinson. at Lebanon Valley witli; Carson F lowers leading the 1